Friday, October 31, 2008

# family # halloween

Happy Halloween?

I did so well holding it together today. Then, just as I pulled into the driveway Roger's favorite song (the Ghostbusters Theme) came on the radio and that was it. I'm curled up on the couch crying my little heart out. A few days of the year I feel like the most awful parent ever and this is one of them. I should be in Michigan, attending their class parties, making them dinner, taking them trick or treating.. but I'm not. I'm in New York, 8 hours away. I would give anything to have spent today with them, but I just couldn't afford to drive there. I miss them so much and it kills me to miss out on parts of their lives. Peter won't take pictures of them in their costumes and he won't have gone to their parties. I guess that's what momma's are for except I'm not there.

To those of you who got to decorate cupcakes or help your babies into their costumes, please know just how blessed you are. I would give anything just to have those simple moments back again.

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2 comments:

Jim said...

No one who hasn't been through what you are going through can truly understand how you feel. By the time my girls came into my life, they were already teenagers (or darn close) and I missed all of the cool stuff you are talking about.

All I can do is say this: You are where you are and doing what you are doing for them, so that when you go back, you can take proper care of them on your own. You are a great mother, even though your children are not with you right now. It is hard now, but in the end, it will all be worth it.

Klo said...

BIG GIANT HUGS sweetie....and I agree with Jim...

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